Jim groaned as he rolled over in bed, his body aching all over. His head throbbed, his stomach churned, and his legs felt like they had run a marathon in his sleep. There was no way he could make it to work today. He reached for his phone and dialed his boss’s number.

The phone rang a few times before his boss answered, his voice brisk as always. “Yeah, Jim? What’s up?”

Jim cleared his throat and tried to sound as miserable as he felt. “Hey, boss. I not come to work today. I really sick. Got a headache, stomach ache, and my legs hurt. I not come work.”

There was a brief pause before his boss sighed. “Jim, you know I really need you today. We’ve got a lot to do, and I can’t afford to be short-handed.”

Jim closed his eyes, expecting his boss to tell him to drag himself in anyway. Instead, his boss chuckled and continued, “Listen, Jim, when I feel like that, I go to my wife. I tell her I’m not feeling great, and she gives me some loving. Makes everything better, and I can get back to work. You should try it.”

Jim blinked in surprise. That was not the kind of advice he had expected. He mumbled a quick, “Okay, boss,” and hung up.

Lying in bed, he pondered his boss’s words. He felt awful, but what if there was some truth to it? Maybe it was worth a shot. After all, what did he have to lose?

A few moments later, he turned to his wife, who was reading a book beside him. She looked over, raising an eyebrow. “What’s wrong?”

Jim hesitated, feeling slightly ridiculous. “Boss said when he feels sick, he goes to his wife. She gives him some love, and he feels better. Maybe it works?”

His wife burst into laughter, shaking her head. “That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.” But then she shrugged, “Well, if it works for your boss, maybe it’s worth a try.”

Jim, still skeptical, went along with it. To his surprise, after a while, he actually started feeling better. His headache seemed to ease, his stomach settled, and his legs no longer felt like lead. Maybe his boss was onto something after all.

A couple of hours later, Jim picked up his phone and called his boss again. When the line connected, he said excitedly, “Boss, I do what you say, and I feel great! I be at work soon.”

There was a pause on the other end before the boss spoke again, a little confused. “See? Told you it works.”

Jim grinned. “Yeah, boss, you got a really nice house.”

Silence.

Jim could almost hear the gears turning in his boss’s head. Then, all at once, there was a sharp inhale. “Wait—Jim, what do you mean?!”

Realization hit, and Jim’s face turned pale. “Uh—gotta go, boss!”

He hung up quickly, staring at his phone in horror. He had misunderstood completely. His boss had been talking about his own wife, not Jim’s wife!

Jim swallowed hard, wondering if he should just call in sick again and avoid work for a few days… or maybe forever.

Meanwhile, on the other end of the line, his boss sat frozen at his desk, staring at his phone in disbelief. Then, shaking his head, he muttered, “I need to be a lot clearer next time.”

Jim did go to work that day, but let’s just say that he avoided making eye contact with his boss for a long, long time.